I like having no one around. I like being by myself. I like being alone, but I’m never lonely. It’s why I do so many things by myself all the time: going on vacation, going to concerts, visiting museums, shopping, going to the cinema. I do it all the time: going places without anyone else around. And I love it.
The longest stretch of being alone (and by that I mean, not seeing anyone I know or interacting with people in any other way but saying thank you when buying something at the store) was probably summer last year. I spent almost 5 weeks all by myself, which was pretty much all of my summer vacation. Another record would be my summer vacation in 2008 when I spent 30 days traveling across the US all by myself. I did see a few friends, but out of those 30 days, there were only 4 or 5 in total which I spent with people.
At the time, I got plenty of people responding to my blog: oh how can you do that, being by yourself for 4 weeks? When I go to another concert by myself, I also get colleagues asking me: wouldn’t you want to go with someone? Or when I say I’ve gone to see a movie and I’ve been by myself, I may even get a frown or two. People don’t really seem to understand or seem to want to understand that you do not always need others to have a good time. Well, at least, I don’t.
I like it. Being alone. It’s when I recharge my battery. It’s when I come to rest. It’s when I have the best ideas. It’s everything to me. To me there is nothing better than having the prospect of coming home after a long day of work or school and just sit behind my computer with a cup of tea and some music playing in the background, while I stare off into space. It’s moments like these that keep me going. If I have too few of them, things tend to go wrong: I get stressed out, I get confused and I start making mistakes. I need my little zen moments. I’m just not the type of person who wants to be around people all day. It drives me mad.
I’ve always been like this too. Even when I was a kid, I’d prefer sitting at home with a book, rather than hanging out with friends. I distinctly remember my mom sending me out the house saying: go find your friends. I came back 5 minutes later, after walking around the block one time, saying that I couldn’t find anyone. So I guess it’s just part of who I am. And I’ve come to accept that, even though most other people don’t seem to. Oh well, I’d rather be a little odd, than going crazy.
Q: Do you have any quirky habits?