Personal update #4

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April was the month of highs and lows. I had tons of fun meeting up with friends and family and I went to another concert. However, I was also informed that my contract will not be renewed and that caused some stress right when I thought life was getting better. With that being said though: this entire burn out thing is teaching me tons of useful skills. And I’m sure no matter what I’ll end up doing, I will reap the benefits of it anyhow.

Last month ended on an up, but just days after that post went up I went to see my boss face to face for the first time in months and I was told that she does not see me return in my current job. I am however, keeping my contract until it runs out and for as long as I have one, they’ll do anything to help me get back on track. This means I have now started regular job coaching sessions and I’ve made my first appointment with a psychologist so things are finally getting underway instead of being stuck at a crossroads. Because for a while (the first two weeks of April or so) I felt stuck in limbo, not knowing what to do or where to go as all I could do was sit around and wait until I went to my appointments. Those appointments have now all happened and I am happy to be back to feeling a lot happier, because I know I’m now working on my recovery again.

The bad news I received but that last bit on the back burner. In fact, it ended up being quite the setback and I felt so disappointed. After months of feeling like complete crap I had started feeling better again and then POOF! Luckily I did notice that my fallback wasn’t as badly as it could have been or would have been a few months ago. I managed to crawl out of my hole a lot quicker this time mainly because I have more energy to do things. It’s one of the reasons why I decided to blog on a daily basis as of now until further notice. I was so ready to get back into the swing of things and then I was simply told that would not be necessary. So to occupy my brain I’ve upped the blog posts and I’m really liking my daily blog schedule so far. It has most certainly helped me to bull up those boot straps and keep going.

Takkie, my parents’ dog over Easter weekend

What also helped were not only my appointments but also my social gatherings with friends, some of them planned, some of them spontaneous and going to see Justin Timberlake was the icing on the cake. I also saw the biggest part of my family again, spent quality time with my parents and their dog. I only had one weekend where I didn’t have anything to do and to top things off I am throwing a King’s Day Pancake Party at my place for a few friends and their kids today. I spent yesterday in the kitchen baking a carrot cake and blueberry bread and then tomorrow I’ll spend a few hours baking almost 40 pancakes. I’m already looking forward to that. I am currently also working on picking up my gym routine. For the past 3 weeks I’ve actually managed to work out 2x a week every week. That’s a first since September!

The best thing that could possibly have happened is that my previous job called to see if I was interested in coming back. Whether this actually happens, I have no clue yet as of the specifics, but their call couldn’t have come at a better time. So I hope that this new month will bring me a couple of things: more recovery, more work outs, a better sense of where I’m going and hopefully, if all goes well, a job.

What have you been up to this month?

7 responses to “Personal update #4”

  1. ninaleecherryambition Avatar

    I’m sorry to hear about your current job situation. (I understand that feeling soooo well, by the way.) But I’m glad to hear that your previous employer is interested in having you back. At the very least, it’s something to fall back on.

    To answer your question, I didn’t do much this month aside from schoolwork and enjoying the warmer weather and blue skies… and online shopping sales. The rest of my life is still pretty boring.

    1. indiequeen84 Avatar

      Totally true. I’d much rather start a job instead of living off of unemployment benefits.

      1. ninaleecherryambition Avatar

        Indeed, UB is not fun. I don’t know how that works in the Netherlands, but if it’s anything like it is here, you’d make more money even in a minimum wage job than you would on UB. However, even now, you likely have more jobs options there than we do here. Here, sometimes UB is the better option.

      2. indiequeen84 Avatar

        I get pre-UB before I get real UB. So I’ll be getting 70% of my last paycheck for the first few months. Luckily!

  2. fantasyandrealityfight Avatar

    Whaah Maaike, wat toppie dat je vorige werk belde! Zelfs al zou je daar niet aan de slag gaan, dan is het nog een fijne opsteker, want het betekent gewoon dat je je werk goed doet!

    Enneh, we hadden het laatst op whatsapp erover om ff x weer af te spreken he. Lijkt mij ook wel weer eens gezellig! (helemaal omdat we elkaar bij bsb niet meer gemeet hebben 🙁 )
    Ik ben alleen in mei nog best druk bezig met m’n scriptie herschrijven. Dus ik weet nog niet helemaal goed of ik dan al een dagje helemaal leeg kan plannen. Maar anders zou juni toch zeker wel moeten lukken! (iig voor mij wel)

    Je bent goed bezig met opkrabbelen iig! Alleen niet alles te snel willen he mopsie!!

    1. indiequeen84 Avatar

      Dank voor je lieve comment 🙂 En nee, ik let wel op hoor. Merk het ook wel als ik teveel doe en dan last ik dus lekker een rustdagje in. Ik app je nog over afspreken.

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